posted 12-08-2000 06:57 PM            

When she was 21 she got pregnant.It was an accident but she was happy anyways..I know that's not a big deal but read on there's more to this story.

When she was 4 months pregnant her boyfriend at the time was taking her to a doctors appointment in a beat up truck with no seatbelts...They got into a horrible car accident. She flew out the windsheild 60ft, breaking her back, bruising her spinal chord, ruptured her spleen and sliced her forehead. She died twice on the way to the hospital. Drugged up for 5 days in intensive care she managed to survive even though she was left paralyzed from the waist down. All she worried about was her baby. Luckily it survived as well. They moved her to a rehab clinic where she spent over a month. Wearing the most uncomfortable brace that was getting even more uncomfortable as her stomach grew with the baby. They had to give her just a neck brace. She swore off all pain medication at that point. Enduring the pain just so her baby wouldn't have to be drugged up anymore.

5 months later *she went full term* she gave birth to a beautiful 6 pound boy. Only 9 months later did they find out he had Cerabal paulsy resulting from the accident. He's still a happy, wonderful, adorable boy. I think he gets it from his mother.

Her boyfriend ended up leaving her for another woman *many many other women* and she had to move back in with her family to help take care of her and the boy. Despite everything she remains sane and even happy * I know I wouldn't be* Her only real problem is she's scared to meet people because of the wheelchair she's afraid they will judge her for it even though she's as amazing as she's always been. She's an absolute inspiration and still as fun loving as ever.
She thinks she will walk again she has feeling in her legs and can move them a tiny bit but all her therapists say is that it's been too long she shoulda been walking again *what do they know, right?* There is too much unknown about spinal choord injuries. I don't think she'll ever give up and she shouldn't.

I just thought this was an amazing story that just might make some of you think a little more positive about what you have and how life could be much much worse.

posted 12-08-2000 07:02 PM            

Thanks for sharing.

posted 12-08-2000 07:37 PM            

Here I sit thinking about the reviews that I recieved this evening.
They were painful because no one seemed as if they even heard the message of hope that I tried so hard to bring.
Thank you for making me keep my perpective together.
To live with gratitude in my heart!
To realise the greatest accompishments in life is things like loving children and wanting to help heal the hurts.
I know that I am still an impossible dreamer.
Perhaps that is all I will ever be.
But thanks to PGL I tried to spread my wings and fly.
I stood at the jumping off place at the cliff.
Took a leap of faith...
I am still breathing.
I am still so very much alive!
I may have much longer to go to achieve a true balnce in my life.
But I dont think I will ever stop trying.
Thank you my friend for your words that glisten like gold!

posted 12-08-2000 09:23 PM            

Why is the unimaginable strength of woman’s spirit ignored?

I believe that black men are the most oppressed in our society, the fact that they are the majority of the prison population attests to this. Beyond the black man, however, is all women. Women give birth to and raise our children, they serve others and, when they are in positions of power, they are outnumbered by men and paid less than their equals. Why is that worse than having your freedom and voting rights taken away? Because women endure a lesser status even among black men.

Women like your friend, AsRiel, are the angels of this world. They embody what I would like to believe we are meant to be, what I pray we are evolving to.

You most definitely should write a book about your friend. She is an inspiration. Her story immediately had me realizing how blessed I am and wondering why I would ever feel any self-pity. It’s a thorn in my spirit. I would love to hear your friend directly telling me how she looks at life so I might understand what brings true happiness.

Thank-you for this story, AsRiel. I hope you and your friend write the book! All the best and many blessings to both of you.

posted 12-08-2000 09:25 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by AsRiaL:
You think if my friend agreed and I wrote a book about her experience that people would read it?

---

posted 12-08-2000 09:57 PM            

As far as someone who made me appreciate my life. I will tell you a personal story.

Almost three years ago, I decided that it was time to part from my ex-husband. He was mean, unattentive, he didn't help with the children, treated me like a second class citizen. One day he said something to me that was so utterly disrespectful, I decided he could not come back into our home. I tossed him out.

But after he was gone I went into a deep depression. I didn't feel beautiful anymore, I had gained weight, I was not the person I was when he met me. When we met, I had everything going for me, by the time he was gone, I had nothing. He also decided, on his way out, not to see the kids, not to give me anything for them, and that he was glad to be gone ( I wont go into that).

The first two days after he left, I went into a depression. I hated myself, I hated my life, I cried, I hated the way I looked. (even though there was nothing wrong with me, i think I was hallucinating) I remember walking into the bathroom, looking into a mirror, and breaking out into tears. I punched it, shattered its glass, and prayed I died.

later that night, I fell asleep with the tv on. And for some reason, about 3:30 a.m, I woke up, and I looked directly at the tv. And there was this woman, her face was so severly burned that she didn't have eyes on her face anymore. Her nose was completely sealed, and she had to have surgery after surgery to repair the damage, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It looked like someone poured acid on her face, and her skin simply slid down. I couldnt hear how she got that way, but I remember her saying that she was grateful to be alive, and that she's glad to have her son. Her eight year old child said that he thought his mother looked like a monster, and sometimes he cries, but he's getting used to it.
And I was complaining about a few pounds! I woke up, and I felt grateful to be me. I know this seems very VAIN, But it made me appreciate how everything can be taken away in an instant. And how unappreciative and vain I really was.

posted 12-09-2000 06:15 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by RicoLaser:
Men are bastards. I can't believe this jerk left the crippled mother of his cerebral-palsied child. I swear to God, sometimes I'm ashamed to be in the same gender as some of these guys I hear about.

---

posted 12-09-2000 07:35 PM            

I send good thoughts for your friend and hope she makes a full recovery.

posted 12-09-2000 07:36 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by mets:
What a nice post.

I send good thoughts for your friend and hope she makes a full recovery.

Mets

---

Thanks! very much appreciated!